Quran Garden

Ever wondered which small acts of kindness can shower you with Allah's immense blessings?  Today, we tell you about one of the shortest ways to Paradise mentioned in many verses of the Quran.  Islam places great emphasis on this virtue, promising peace and prosperity in return.  Let's begin.                                                         

Session 603

Chapter 4

Verse 36

a continuation

Worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him, and be good to your parents, to relatives, orphans, the needy, neighbours near and far,  the companion by your side, travellers in need, and to those whom your right hands possess.  Surely, God does not like arrogant, boastful people.

(Chapter 4: Verse 36)

God Almighty starts the verse with the most critical command of all, "Worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him," then immediately follows with "and be good to your parents."

These two commands are perfectly aligned and logical.  Why?  Because, while Allah is the invisible Creator, your parents are the visible, tangible reason for your existence.  They brought you to life, showered you with infinite care, and provided for you.  Honoring and caring for them is a fundamental acknowledgment of their favor when you were young.  Gratitude to your parents should inspire appreciation and recognition of prior generations – your grandparents and great-grandparents - leading back to the first human, Adam, and ultimately acknowledging God's role as the Creator. 

Likewise, denying your parents their right is the first step in a chain that will lead to denying Allah.

God says, "Worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him, and be good to your parents." Consider the high status Allah has given to the mother and father by linking their good treatment to His worship!  More interestingly, God did not address the parents' faith or disbelief.  In another verse, He says,

If they strive to make you associate with Me anything about which you have no knowledge, then do not obey them.  Yet keep their company courtesy in this life according to what is right and follow the path of those who turn to Me.  You will all return to Me in the end, and I will tell you everything that you have done.  (31:15)

Allah is commanding you: in matters of disbelief, you are not to obey your parents, but you still have to treat them with respect, for they are the immediate cause of your existence and upbringing. 

Allah uses one of two terms to describe proper dealings with family and friends.  The first is courtesy -Ma'aroof (معروفًا)- which means common courtesy and fair treatment, and the second is affection -Mawadda (مودة)- which means emotional bond and love.  If your parents are non-believers, Allah commands you to treat them well and fulfill their material and physical needs.  This duty is out of kindness, not affection.  Affection is reserved for your brothers and sisters in faith.

Now, let's look through the Quran and examine the words Allah used to describe how you should treat your parents:

In Surah An-Nisaa, God says,

Worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him, and be good to your parents.

In Surah Al-Baqarah Aya 83,

Remember when We took a pledge from the Children of Israel: 'Worship none but God; be good to your parents.

In Surah An-Am,

Say, 'Come!  I will tell you what your Lord has really forbidden you.  Do not ascribe anything as a partner to Him; be good to your parents.

In Al-Ahqaf,

We have instructed man to be good to his parents.  His mother bore him with difficulty and with difficulty gave birth to him; and his bearing and weaning take thirty months.  Then, when he achieves his full strength and reaches forty, he says, "My Lord, keep me thankful for the blessing You bestowed on me and on my parents, and keep me acting rightly, pleasing You. And make my descendants righteous.  I have turned to You, and I am truly one of the Muslims."

In Surah Al-Ankabut, He says,

We have instructed man to honour his parents, but if they pressure you to associate with Me, something about which you have no knowledge, do not obey them.  It is to Me you will return, and I will inform you about the things you did.

In all the verses above, Allah used the word "إحسان" or "حسن" to describe how you should treat your parents.  "إحسان" means going above obligation and beyond expectation.  God says,

and lower to them the wing of humbleness out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them, as they raised me up when I was little." (17:24)

Prophet Muhammad –peace be upon him- explained: "Ihsan is to worship God as if you see Him; for if you cannot see Him, then rest assured that He sees you." Allah wants you to be your own judge; Your faith should direct you to do a perfect job even when no one is looking.  Sadly, the majority of Muslims today are no longer governed by their conscience or sense of good.  We have to install surveillance cameras in stores to monitor theft and employee slacking off.  Do a good job because you are a Muslim, not for the sake of money or simply to get things done.

Do you want to know how to reach the level of Ihsan, not only in treating your parents, but in all aspects of life?  Allah gives us a detailed description in the following verses:

The righteous will be in Gardens with ?owing springs.  They will receive their Lord's gifts because of the Ihsan they did before: sleeping only a little at night, praying at dawn for God's forgiveness, giving a share of their wealth to the beggar and the deprived. (51:15-19)

Did Allah ask you to stay up at night to pray?  No, He did not.  You can fulfil your obligation by praying the night Isha prayer and then going to sleep.  If you want to enter the realm of Ihsan, however, then you would pray additional prayers after Isha and into the night.

Did Allah ask you to wake up before dawn and pray for forgiveness?  No, He did not.  You can fulfil your obligation by sleeping till the morning Fajr prayer.  But if you want to enter the realm of Ihsan, you would wake up a little earlier to spend some time with your Lord in prayer. 

How about charity?  Allah asked you for a small percentage of your excess wealth, ranging from 2.5% to 20% as Zakat almsgiving.  He says:

Those who are regular in their prayers, who give a due share of their wealth to the needy and the deprived (70:23-25)

Did you notice the difference between obligation and 'Ihsan'?  When Allah spoke about obligation, He said: 'those who give a due share of their wealth.' However, when He spoke about Ihasn, He said: 'those giving a share of their wealth' omitting the word 'due' because when you practice 'Ihasn' you choose to give more than what is due. 

Those who do Ihsan realize that Allah deserves far more than what He obligated.  A righteous man, in a moment of reflection, said, "O Allah, I fear You will not reward me for obedience because I have come to desire it." This man no longer saw any hardship in obligation.  He continued, "My Lord, I have come to love worship, and you commanded us to restrain our desires, but this has become my desire.  What should I do?!" When this man achieved the level of Ihsan, his soul found peace, and his desires aligned with what Allah commanded.

Take note that when it comes to your parents, Allah obligated Ihsan!  That is the bare minimum.  As you learned above, please do not limit yourself to the minimum required with your parents; strive for kindness, generosity, gentleness, and compassion toward them, with humility beyond what is needed.  May Allah bless you and your family.