Quran Garden

Curious about how polygamy is addressed in the Quran?  In today's video, we start to unpack the 3rd aya of Surah An-Nissa, the rules for polygamy, and the deeper meaning behind it all.  It's an eye-opener you won't want to skip!  Let's begin.

Session 541

Chapter 4

Verse 3

If you are afraid of not behaving justly towards orphans, then marry other permissible women, two, three, or four.  But if you are afraid of not treating them equally, then content yourselves with only one or the captives that your right hands possess.  That is more likely to make you avoid bias.  (Chapter 4: Verse 3)

In the previous session, we discussed the rights and responsibilities of the guardian caring for an orphan.  In today's Aya, Allah highlights another vulnerable group in society—where orphanhood and being female intersect.  While all orphans are vulnerable, female orphans are particularly at risk.  Why?  Because the guardian taking care of an orphan girl might think, 'I'm in charge of all her assets now.  I would really like that money for myself.  Why not marry her and take control of the property?'  An adult woman can often fend off injustice, and fathers usually step in to defend their young daughters.  However, orphans, especially if they are female, are more likely to be oppressed because they lost their protector.  While injustice is always wrong, it's especially grievous when aimed at those who can't defend themselves.  

The verse begins with, "If you are afraid of not behaving justly." Here, Allah wants you to be conscientious in both: managing the orphan's wealth and shielding them from exploitation.  This advice is not only directed toward the guardian caring for the orphan but every Muslim man who is considering marrying an orphan.  We each know ourselves best and should be wise enough to avoid oppressing others.  If you sense that you may be unjust or greedy, especially towards female orphans, steer clear and look somewhere else.  If you want to marry, there are plenty of other women. 

Here, the matter of polygamy becomes relevant.  Allah does not say to leave one orphan and choose another but advises leaving the orphans and choosing from among the many women available.  Therefore, it is fitting that the issue of polygamy is addressed now, as Allah wants to prevent men from marrying orphaned girls out of power or greed.  Instead, He advises them to marry from among the many other women available, stating, "If you are afraid of not behaving justly towards orphans, then marry other permissible women, two, three, or four."

But there are some conditions, such as choosing from "permissible women." Which women are permissible?  God gave us a detailed explanation of those who are prohibited in marriage in the following ayat,

Do not marry any women your fathers married – except for what may have already occurred.  That is an indecent act, a loathsome thing, and an evil path.  You are forbidden to take as wives your mothers, daughters, sisters, paternal and maternal aunts, the daughters of brothers and daughters of sisters, your foster mothers who have breastfed you, your foster sisters by breastfeeding, your wives' mothers, the stepdaughters in your care- those born of women with whom you have consummated the marriage -If you have not consummated the marriage, then you will not be blamed,- wives of your begotten sons, two sisters simultaneously- with the exception of what may have already taken place.  God is most forgiving and merciful- (4:22-23)

And we find a warning in another aya,

The adulterer is only fit to marry an adulteress or an idolatress, and the adulteress is only fit to marry an adulterer or an idolater; such behavior is forbidden to believers. (24:3)

Allah wants to discourage men from marrying orphaned girls out of fear that in a moment of weakness or greed, a man might pressure them into marriage and handing over their wealth.  The guidance is clear: protect the orphan from injustice and protect yourself from sin by seeking other women—two, three, or four—.  Stay away so that her wealth does not tempt you or because she has no father to look after her interests.

Let's take a moment to examine the phrase, "then marry other permissible women, two, three, or four." The word 'two' comes from the Arabic "Mathna," meaning a pair.  For example, if you say, "My party guests arrived Mathna," it implies they came in pairs, like a man and his wife first, then a father and son, and so on.  Similarly, in this aya, 'three' -translated from the Arabic Thulath- means groups of three, and 'four' refers to groups of four.

Some people looked at God's choice of the words, "Mathna and Thulath" -rather than "two and three"- and said that the intention behind it was that marrying nine women is allowed: adding two plus three plus four.  We answer that your calculation is wrong.  According to your logic, we should consider 'two' as a pair, which means four, 'three' would mean six, and 'four' would mean eight, making a total of eighteen, at a minimum.  However, you completely misunderstood the verse because you dismissed the fact that Allah is addressing a group of men of marriage age, not an individual.  In language, addressing a group with collective terms implies individual actions.  Let me explain: when a teacher says to his students, "Open your books to page fifteen," it does not mean that one student should open all his or her books; instead, the correct meaning is for each student to open their own book to that page.  Similarly, when race car drivers are instructed with: "Start your engines!" each driver should start the engine of his or her car. 

Thus, when God says, addressing all Muslim men, "If you are afraid of not behaving justly towards orphans, then marry other permissible women, two, three, or four," it means that one man can marry two women, another can marry three, and a third marry four.  But remember that when Allah legislates a ruling, He sometimes makes it obligatory and sometimes permissible.  There is a difference between God requiring you to do something and allowing you to do it.  He did not make polygamy obligatory for men but rather permissible.  In fact, marriage itself, even to one woman, is not an obligation in Islam. 

If you look around Islamic societies today, you find that women hate polygamy, and the entire process is often frowned upon.  Some go as far as questioning the Lord's wisdom.  Is this out of jealousy and spite?  In the next session, we will explain why this happens.  Make sure to subscribe and hit the bell icon so you do not miss the Tafsir of this important aya.